When God doesn’t feel like enough

I know, sounds a bit extreme. A good Christian should NOT be allowed to say something like that. But can we just all be honest with ourselves for a minute? Sometimes, some days, our human hearts search for more than what God has already provided.

When God reminds us that we’re beautiful, made in His image, and joint-heirs with Christ. But still, we seek affirmation from that guy we know is not good news.

We receive a promotion for which we do not feel qualified, and God reminds us that we’re more than conquerors – that we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. But still, we frantically tell our friends and coworkers how we don’t know how in the world we’re going to do this job. It’s too much for you. You couldn’t possibly do it.

When we’re emotionally dry. Something has sucked the life out of us. Someone broke our heart. We feel hollow – a bit dead inside. God reminds us that He is near to those who are brokenhearted and comforts those who weep. He will bring joy in the morning to those who are in sorrow at night. But still, the comfort of the Father doesn’t always feel like it fills the cracks inside.

If you tell me that you’ve never felt  that sometimes what God provided wasn’t enough, even if you didn’t admit it out loud, I’m calling your bluff. We’re human. We’ve failed. We’ve failed to rely completely on the perfect God that we serve.

If I’m being honest, I’ve been feeling this a lot lately. I’ve been struggling to find my complete fulfillment 100% of the time in Jesus. When someone lets me down, doesn’t live up to my expectations, or isn’t the greatest example of compassion and love, I don’t always remember that I can still be at peace because Jesus will never let me down. He is always the perfect answer, and He will always be there for me.

But sometimes, I can’t see into the supernatural where He is, and I stay focused on the things in front of me. I see my job, which makes me feel like a toddler trying on her mother’s shoes. It’s too big for me to handle, and I don’t know why God picked me for this position. I see my relationships – rocky and unpredictable in some areas. I struggle with living at rest and in contentment when not everyone in my life is happy with me. I see my schooling, uncompleted and looming over my head. I should be done with it by now, society says. I wonder if God actually is sticking around to see me through it, rather than relying on Him having a plan for it all.

I love Jesus. I love Jesus… More than I love anyone else. But I still struggle with seeing Him as enough in every area of my life. I’ve been in church my whole life. I’ve never really had a season of life where I would say I walked away from God completely. But even in the times I feel closest to Him, I doubt. I have questions. I’m disappointed. I have frustrations with God.

I know I’m not alone. I know I’m not the only one in this world who gets frustrated with God, with life, and with circumstances because of losing sight of His “enough-ness.”

So, in this process of telling God how you’re feeling and being vulnerable with your thoughts, don’t forget to take in truth as well. Because the truth is, His grace is sufficient for you. His joy is overflowing. He gives good gifts to His children. You are worth more than anything else He created. You have the mind of Christ. He will give you the strength for every situation. He is the only one who can comfort you back to wholeness when you’re broken.

This morning, Jesus told me to hold onto peace. Even though I’m preaching to the choir a bit here, hold onto peace as your “more than enough” gift from Jesus today.

And don’t be afraid to be honest with God. He can take it. I promise.

Lauren

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